Narcissists on Social Media — the right way to Spot and avoid Them
February 15, 2016
Metamorphosis of Narcissus by using Salvador Dali (via Wikicommons)
I saw a super quote the other day: “facebook and narcissism go together like espresso and biscotti.” by using commentary, we can see that it’s authentic of most social media platforms, and studies on the topic from numerous sources beef up these observations—over the previous couple of decades, we’ve turn out to be even more narcissistic than ever.
- A study in 2010 compared characteristics and life targets of individuals in high school and faculty nowadays versus those of Gen-Xers and baby Boomers all through their time in class. the results printed a pointy raise in extrinsic values versus intrinsic ones. In different phrases, it’s more doubtless for Millennials to value money, picture and fame over neighborhood, affiliation and self-acceptance.
- studies have also found that narcissistic individuals are likely to have a big assortment of facebook friends, tag themselves in photographs and incessantly update their standing. additionally they scored better on the Narcissistic personality inventory questionnaire.
but…
will we in reality Blame Social Media?
From my perspective, NO, we cannot. by means of selecting to allocate blame on this approach, we obviate emotional intelligence and private responsibility, the concept human beings choose, instigate, or otherwise result in their own movements. while it seems to be authentic that social media web sites motivate self-advertising, it’s necessary to comprehend that Narcissism frequently stems from low self-esteem. Social media doesn’t create what I refer to as “Narcs”—it only expands their attain.
Many studies over the past few many years have confirmed that once oldsters compliment kids for abilities they’ve yet to master, or talents that they don’t actually have, these kids finish up more insecure. it appears that oldsters confuse constructing vainness with making a monster—the lethal “Narc”.
writer and author, Lisa Firestone, PhD, has written extensively about the basic variations of vanity vs. narcissism. She wrote:
vainness differs from narcissism in that it represents an attitude built on accomplishments we’ve mastered, values we’ve adhered to, and care we’ve shown towards others. Narcissism, conversely, is often according to a concern of failure or weak point, a focus on one’s self, an unhealthy power to be considered as the perfect, and a deep-seated insecurity and underlying feeling of inadequacy.
obviously this disorder has increased over time, but it’s nothing new—from Sigmund Freud to Carl Jung, mavens have struggled to define the absolute cause of this condition.
What exactly Is a Narcissist?
It goes back to Greek Mythology. Narcissus was once good-looking, self-concerned and boastful; he simply liked his personal picture. He spent nearly all of his time watching at his reflection in a pool of water. ultimately, the Gods grew indignant and became him right into a statue. then again, realizing that they would possibly have taken their rage a tad too a long way, they took pity on him and turned him into a flower—namely, the Narcissus.
in keeping with the American Psychiatric association, the narcissistic personality is a dysfunction made up of these 9 characteristics:
- A grandiose experience of vanity (exaggerates achievements and skills)
- Preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited success, energy, brilliance, beauty or top love.
- Believes that he or she is “different” and unique and can best be understood by, or will have to associate with, other special or high-standing individuals (or institutions).
- Requires excessive admiration.
- Has a way of entitlement (unreasonable expectations of favorable remedy or automatic compliance along with his or her expectations).
- Is interpersonally exploitative (takes benefit of others to reach his or her own ends).
- Lacks empathy (unwilling to acknowledge or establish with the feelings and needs of others).
- Is incessantly green with envy of others or believes that others are green with envy of him or her.
- displays arrogance, haughty behaviors or attitudes.
now not What You Do, however how you Do It
you can’t ignore the truth that study after study factors to 1 factor—used unwisely and with out mindfulness, social media can and steadily does elevate Narcissistic characteristics in everybody.
however it’s also proper that different folks use social media in different methods: Some use it as a instrument for professional reasons, some to stay in contact with friends and family, and others to advertise reasons they care about.
If, like me, you use social media for multiple reasons, you’ve most certainly come across the dreaded “Narc.” It’s a problem to establish and to remain away from them. Many will also be disarmingly charming, but a snappy dive beneath the skin and wham—a full blown “Narc” has entered your social media world.
And as it happens in real lifestyles, they can cause serious havoc when you let them get too shut.
how you can Spot a Narc on Social Media
Narcissists tend to use social media as a way to drink in the love. They’re additionally very adept at manipulating others. Most of us attempt to keep away from them, and people of us who are conscious also are trying to not emulate them.
As we expand our connections, they transform more difficult to steer clear of. the next is certainly not an entire checklist, however these are some behaviors to look ahead to a means to “crimson flag” the “Narcs”. In no particular order:
- Posts often, but hardly comments on others’ comments or posts;
- Likes or comments principally or exclusively in keeping with feedback that straight away contain themselves;
- Posts a great many posed selfies, on a regular basis to sing their own praises their very best (and steadily most seductive) features;
- Their posts or comments are mostly grandiose and self-selling, handiest showing passion in others when it fits their very own needs;
- If individuals aren’t paying enough consideration to them, they’ll level this out—ceaselessly very blatantly—but will simplest reply to comments that feed their ego;
- uses what seem like self-effacing comments (like striking down their preferences or achievements), allegedly so that you can share their experiences for the advantage of others. in truth, they’re regularly in search of compliments to reassure their fragile ego.
when you notice individuals tend to do some or these types of issues, chances are you’ll like to preserve your distance. to not be merciless or even to face in judgment, but to keep toxic folks from causing you any harm.
There’s a bit the “Narc” inside anyone. What’s essential is that we remain aware and now not let it get out of hand. It’s not all the time easy, but then again, life doesn’t seem to were designed to be easy.
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