What does it really mean to be happy at work? Probably not what you think.

Happiness is one of the most sought-after experiences: We all want joy in our personal lives, delight in our work, and bliss in our relationships. But happiness can also be elusive—and it’s unrealistic to think you can achieve total happiness every day, across all aspects of your life.

A better approach is to consider what happiness really means and reflect on how you experience it. Then you can create the conditions for more happiness at home and at work. 

I’m a sociologist who studies work-life happiness and fulfillment, and I have found that happiness is not always what people imagine it to be. Here’s what I have learned about what happiness really looks like.

The spillover effect of happiness

Happiness is one of the most universally recognized emotions. Research published in the Psychological Bulletin found that, when people interact across cultures, happiness is one of the most familiar emotions and the one which tends to give people a sense of unity and camaraderie.

In addition, happiness is something people experience across many different life circumstances, and our happiness is often not contained to just our work or our personal lives. When you’re happy with your work, you tend to experience greater levels of happiness in the rest of your life. The opposite is also true: When you’re happier outside of work, you tend to experience greater happiness with your work experience.

This is what is known as “the spillover effect” and it is why compartmentalizing the different parts of our lives can be so difficult. 

The complexity of happiness

With all of the recent focus on happiness at work, it’s important to know that great work experiences are more complex and nuanced than having a sense of pure euphoria every day. You can have ups and downs—good days and bad days (or weeks)—and still have an overall sense of joy and satisfaction with your work.

No choice will result in perfect pleasure. Whether it’s the type of work you do, the hours you work, or the organization you work for, every choice is a set of circumstances. Some will be terrific and others, not so much. Your best bet is to figure out what you love to do and then get as much alignment as possible between what you enjoy and what you must do. The overlap won’t be perfect, but a more alignment will grant you greater joy in your job.

Every day, you make small decisions to engage or detach from your work. As you do, it’s wise to be intentional about your approach and reflective about what happiness at work actually is. Remembering that no situation ever produces only happiness can ground you and remind you that the grass is not always greener. 

Happiness is dedication

One thing I have learned in my research is that when people are happy at work, they often experience dedication—a feeling of working hard and committing to their efforts. When you persevere in solving a problem or when you are conscientious about pointing out an issue and taking initiative to resolve it, you’re dedicated. When you are loyal to a team or feel a level of allegiance to the organization, you’re experiencing dedication.

In a study of 5,000 people by Muse, quiet quitting was found to have a negative effect on happiness and brain health—with people suffering from worsening memory, focus, sleep, mood, productivity, and creativity. This suggests that detaching from your role, giving up, or failing to do your fair share at work can result in a worse overall wellbeing. Instead, it can often be better to commit to the things in your life and dedicate yourself. And if you’re still not happy, take action and make another choice, rather than to simply give up.

Some of the happiest people commit themselves to doing great work. And even if you’re not in an idyllic role at the moment, I recommend trying your best and investing in bringing your best to the experience. By doing so, you’ll not only feel more empowered and in control, but you’ll also build your credibility and your relationships with others who know they can count on you.

Happiness is immersion

When you feel greater happiness at work, you also tend to feel immersed. We see this when we get going on a project and lose track of time. During these kinds of experiences of flow, your brain becomes focused on performing a task. And during that time, there is less blood flow to the centers of your brain which concern themselves with judging others or yourself. In a state of flow or immersion, you’re single-minded and honed in on accomplishing something.

Immersion also helps you avoid comparisons, which tend to detract from joy. Social media is a primary source of comparisons and, according to a study by the University of Tennessee Chattanooga, the more time people spend on social media, the more likely they are to feel negative about themselves in comparison with others. In fact, after being exposed to social media, 53% of people feel envy and 36% feel worried.

Here’s what this means for you: Immerse yourself in your work and avoid worrying about what others are doing around you. Be present and focused, and avoid distractions like phones and social media.

Another way to immerse yourself is to learn something new or jump into a project that is outside your comfort zone or current areas of expertise. When you’re working hard, stretching, and learning, you’re more likely to feel happy because you’re expanding your capabilities and are being stimulated by exploring new things. You’re immersed in mastering something new.

Happiness is vibrancy

Another characteristic of happiness at work is feeling vibrant and energized. This energy tends to travel in two directions: You can be energized by what you’re doing and want to invest energy in turn, or you can want to invest energy in something and be energized by this effort. 

Vibrancy can also come from the people around you. Research has found when people around you are energized and engaged, you tend to be more motivated as well. And when people on your team are performing well, it tends to amp up the performance of the group.

To foster this kind of happiness, be sure to nurture your curiosity and your connections. Ask yourself questions and investigate things you don’t already know. Curiosity is one of the most in-demand skills today, so in addition to expanding your happiness, you’ll also grow your career.

I also recommend you seek meaningful connections with others. Learning from others, feeling a sense of community, helping others, and spending time with them are linked with happiness. To increase your happiness in your work, get to know your coworkers, build relationships with your colleagues, and seek mentorship relationships where you can offer coaching and receive coaching as well.

Happiness is purpose

When you’re happy, you are more likely to feel like your work matters and, even more, like you matter as well. And this tie between meaning and happiness can go both ways. 

Often, a sense of purpose is driven by feeling that there is a bigger picture outside of yourself. True purpose is also characterized by a feeling like you are making a difference to real people, not just to corporate results. For instance, it’s the work you do on the new customer interface that makes a client’s experience a little easier, or the marketing program you lead which brightens someone’s day, that fosters a sense of purpose, rather than simply driving sales.

To boost your happiness, clarify the meaning of your work and how it ladders up to the overall purpose of the organization. Recognize colleagues, knowing that you’re contributing to a culture of appreciation from which you’ll benefit as well. Pay attention to what coworkers need from you and follow through, knowing that your work will affect others.

What a happy future looks like

It’s a myth that pursuing happiness for its own sake is a good idea. There are two reasons for this. First, looking for happiness reminds you of what you don’t already have—rather than all you have to be grateful for today. Second, pursuing happiness for its own sake tends to draw your focus to your own needs.

Instead, when you focus on contributing to others’ needs and making a difference in your community, you are more likely to feel a sense of joy. Instead of chasing happiness as its own end, create the conditions for joyful work and life by committing to great work, immersing yourself, investing energy, and reminding yourself of how your work matters. All of these will help you accomplish greater happiness today, over time, at home, and at work.